Being an Adventurer, a Dreamer and a Fool
I suppose I’m somewhat cheating the usual emotional rollercoaster of coming home, because I’m zooming off again in January. So while it’s normal to feel ridiculously excited to see your friends and family again, most get the “And now I have to work” crash. Or even worse, “Now I have to job hunt” (been there). Well, I’m doing things a little differently this time. I fell in love in Colombia. He’s Australian and if you want to learn more about his side of things, read here. I’ve nicknamed it the ‘I Love Caroline’ blog. We met five months ago and we’ve now been apart for three which is TORTURE!
To put you in the picture:
I left home (the UK) to travel around the world in January. I met Bronson in July. We travelled together in Colombia, Cuba and Ecuador for two and a half months. He left in September back to Oz for his brother’s wedding and he flies into the UK on 30th December (not a moment too soon). Then on 17th Jan we fly to Spain to do a volunteer teaching programme called Diverbo. On 27th Jan we fly to Buenos Aires to live. Got that? Nope? It’s taken me a while to get my head around our crazy lovestruck plan as well.
Bronson wrote me a beautiful love letter and included some quotes from a book he’s just finished called Jungle. I love this one especially:
“Here is my advice to you, the adventurers – fear will show you the way; walk steadily towards it, for otherwise you will always be running. Have trust and faith to guide you like a torch piercing the darkness. Do not believe and do not deny, but find out for yourself – for there is no truth but the one you have earned in your own experience.”
For me this is perfect and amazing. Quotes like this urge me on the crazy paths I chose. I will be an artist who makes money from my art. I will move to another city and country, which when I agreed to move, I’d never seen. I will move in with a man I’ve spent more time apart from than with.
So my time here in Surrey is really enjoyable and I’m savouring all the things I have. Like our family dog Rosie. Today I took her on a very muddy walk, we had a lovely time watching the sun set at 4pm. Utter darkness at 5pm is something I won’t have to deal with in Buenos Aires!
My friend Kirsty has fallen in love with a man she’s been going out with for three months. After a month she left her old life in Guernsey and moved unquestioningly to Surrey to be with the man of her dreams. She’s an adventurer of another kind. I wouldn’t call her a risk taker in this instance because she is so certain of their future. Today we wandered the shops of Cranleigh and had a lovely lunch at The Richard Onslow.
Bronson and I are counting down the days, I miss him every second. But the days are fun-filled. And so I’m bouncing on an unusual emotional rollercoaster during which the main feeling is anticipation. My being feels incomplete, in a state of limbo. But soon… Roll on 30th!